Little or nothing is known about the Grim Eater, but there have been reports that over the last couple of years he has been gatecrashing stranger's funerals and filling both his tummy and Tupperware containers with any funeral finger food that he could get his grubby mits on. Grieving New Zealanders were made aware of his presence and after a run in with a group of concerned funeral directors, he decided to head across the sea in search of funeral-licking delights. It was in England that he finally crossed paths with the world's fattest man.
Unfortunately for the Grim Eater the world's fattest man had already finished his lingering existence but he soon found sanctuary for the loss in his memorial buffet. Many of the people that had been filling the world's fattest man's trough with food for the last couple of decades turned up at the funeral party and brought with them a selection of snacks in memory of his love of the occasional gorge. However, many of the mourners found it odd when the well prepared and oppurtunistic Grim Eater arrived with a team of staff that he hired to collect not only any available foods but also any leftovers on anyones plate and/or hands.
The irony of the Grim Eater's final feast is that not long after his boldest feast he was found incarcerated in a pool of his own waste, face down and as limp as the idle prawns floating in his vomit. As punishment New Zealand authorities had his remains expatriated and given out in the form of a selection of canopies at all civil funerals in October 2010. The public consensus was that of satisfcation towards this policy and met it with open mouths. Many people are now advoctaing the provision of goverment sanctioned corspe cuisine at local schools, hospitals and homeless shelters. Unfortunately this practice has been misinterpreted by the homeless community and consequently there has been a minor backlash by South Islanders.
Perhaps this is the evolution of the Grim Eaters vision for a better funeral...
2 comments:
"corpse cuisine", the potential is huge!!!
There really is, statistics have shown that if corpses were consumed rather than disposed of wastefully there would be a 43.8% drop in world hunger, this would be slightly offset by a the lack of corpses which would have come about through starvation and would settle at a mean decrease in world hunger of 36.3%!!
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