The Biggest Volcanic Eruptions In History

Some of the biggest volcanic eruptions in human history have not always occurred in the typical places of interest. For some of you the eruption may even be a little closer to home. Here is a list of the the Top 5 biggest volcanic eruptions in recorded history. 

Ilopango in El Salvador had its biggest eruption in 260 AD producing more than 10 cubic kilometers of volcanic ash. 

Taupo in New Zealand, it's largest recorded eruption happened in 186. A.D. and it produced 80 cubic kilometers of volcanic ash. The pyroclastic flow traveled for up to 100 kilometers. 

This is what is left of the the volcano in Santorini in Greece, the eruption in 1470 AD produced over 10 cubic kilometers of ash but worse still it completely destroyed the Minoan civilization (along with all the minotaurs).

Kikai is a mostly submerged caldera or super-volcano off the south coast of Japan. It exploded in 4300 BC and produced 100 cubic kilometers of volcanic ash, the pyroclastic flow spread across the ocean 100km and devastated parts of southern Japan. 

Mount Mazama otherwise known as crater lake in Oregon exploded in 4650 BC producing more than 100 cubic kilometers of volcanic ash, at this time this area of America was sparsely inhabited, if such an eruption were to occur today the consequences would be disastrous. 

The Grim Eater's Last Supper on the World's Fattest Man

Little or nothing is known about the Grim Eater, but there have been reports that over the last couple of years he has been gatecrashing stranger's funerals and filling both his tummy and Tupperware containers with any funeral finger food that he could get his grubby mits on. Grieving New Zealanders were made aware of his presence and after a run in with a group of concerned funeral directors, he decided to head across the sea in search of funeral-licking delights. It was in England that he finally crossed paths with the world's fattest man.

Unfortunately for the Grim Eater the world's fattest man had already finished his lingering existence but he soon found sanctuary for the loss in his memorial buffet. Many of the people that had been filling the world's fattest man's trough with food for the last couple of decades turned up at the funeral party and brought with them a selection of snacks in memory of his love of the occasional gorge. However, many of the mourners found it odd when the well prepared and oppurtunistic Grim Eater arrived with a team of staff that he hired to collect not only any available foods but also any leftovers on anyones plate and/or hands.

The irony of the Grim Eater's final feast is that not long after his boldest feast he was found incarcerated in a pool of his own waste, face down and as limp as the idle prawns floating in his vomit. As punishment New Zealand authorities had his remains expatriated and given out in the form of a selection of canopies at all civil funerals in October 2010. The public consensus was that of satisfcation towards this policy and met it with open mouths. Many people are now advoctaing the provision of goverment sanctioned corspe cuisine at local schools, hospitals and homeless shelters. Unfortunately this practice has been misinterpreted by the homeless community and consequently there has been a minor backlash by South Islanders.

Perhaps this is the evolution of the Grim Eaters vision for a better funeral...