Dancing Man Art (Scroll Down For Literal Bigness!)

Thai Secret Weapon Revealed: Want Larger Breasts Slap Them, Want A Nice Face, Slap It!

A Thai women slaps breast and gets paid in the process. This gift of slapping breasts until they are big were passed onto the natural health practitioner Khemmikka Na Songkhla by her grandmother. Her godmother found her calling when she found a flat-breasted teenager using cream to try make her breasts bigger.

How does this work? According to her by slapping the breasts skillfully, she can move excess fat toward the breasts and enlarges them by inches post-slap. She said 'If your breasts are 30 inches, for example, we will record that with your signature. After treatment, your breasts will be enlarged to 32 inches. We will record and you have to sign again.' Even as I write this it is hard to take it seriously, but the Thai government is taking it very seriously. Thai Health Ministry ministry has approved it and even gone as far to sponsor women who are will snub surgery in favour for slapping their breasts into bigness.

To learn these slapping skills, it can cost as much as $330,000! Here is a before-and-after pictures of a client in the Bangkok Post. She had four sessions, she also paid to be trained to slap her own face 'I learned face-slapping because I believe it is a one million per cent natural beauty treatment. When I saw what happened to my face, the face-slapping training course became very interesting to me.' Well what are you waiting for start slapping your face :)

Step back into the 1950s with the Sexy Scarlett Fury and her Suspenders

After a long sabbatical we are proud to start writing posts for the aesthetics category on MRHP. In the valley of our absence a 1950s starlet has appeared on the vintage fashion circuit. Currently acting as a pin-up for vintage experience brand OhSoWow. The clips associated with this post give an insight into the sexy, yet playful reappropriations of what it is to be classically feminine.

The above clip titled "The Tease" defines that which Scarlett Fury is trying to portray. Not only does it act as a window into past representations of woman, but also provides a unique sense of that which can be best portrayed as the vintage experience.

This final clip portrays a perky vintage housewife in classic 1950s dress preparing for the arrival of her darling husband from work. What these clips culminate is the OhSoWow experience day that will be launching in London from the 3rd Dec 2011. Judging from these clips, hanging out with Scarlett Fury would not only appear fun, but also would provide a unique day in which you could take a step into the past.

Mouthwatering Underwater Sculptures

Gazin upon these, a fictional pompeii, constructed underwater with figures of modern pathos and opsis, a society where we observe a chubby man in front of a television with a burger and chips. Art can be saturated with interpretative materials and guidelines before one can actually see the art with the purity of their own essences. So we encourage you, just dive into this sea of sculptures,and afterwords we will provide a link for those who want to know more about these beautiful sculptures. Now feast your eyes on this:)

More information at http://www.underwatersculpture.com/

Shower Thing

Clip of something that we found in the shower.

Basic Special Effects Tutorial - How to do a Small Laceration

It is very straight forward to do a small laceration. Place a small amount of spirit gum (which is an adhesive) in the area that you want it and in the shape that you want it. While you are letting that get tacky decant some soft putty/wax. Only a small amount is needed, as you can see from my video I was a bit over zealous. Roll it into a sausage shape and sit it on top of the now sticky spirit gum. Using the spatula tool, blend the sides of the putty down onto skin and do this around the entire perimeter. When that is complete, it is optional if you want to set with powder and camouflage with foundation. Bare in mind it is not always necessary. Take the end of a hairpin and slide it down the center of the putty, splitting it down the middle and making it into a laceration. Fill in the centre of the wound with some dark red or black grease paint using a small brush. Next stipple some red grease paint around the edge of the wound to give the effect of traumatised skin. Using a cotton bud remove some of the stippling to give a mottled effect. Ensure that the effect does not look makeupy as it does not translate well onto camera. Finally add blood liberally.

The following clips give a run through of procedure.

Urban Outfitters Selling Child Porn?

This is Hailey Clauson when she was 15 years of age. The image was used on a racy t-shirt sold in Urban Outfitters, the store that sells you cheap stuff for ludicrous prizes. Young Hailey is suing the boutique shop for a mouthwatering 28 million dollers.

Jason Lee Parry, the photographer of these images is accused of making "her crotch area the focal point of the image" making it pedophile fodder.

And now for our sponsors Sexy Hot Tan, ever feel the burning urge to get near Will Ferrell's crotch well now you can with Sexy Hot Tank...you Will buy it.

Kate Moss Diesel Hologram

Animals Win!

Music With 1000 Pairs Of Jeans

M Jeans believe that even ill-fitting jeans have something to contribute. That's why we they asked many of their customers to send them their obsolete pairs... 

...And approached artist Andrew Huang to do something never heard before: Create a musical celebration of jeans.

Alexander McQueen VS Matthew Barney

After looking into the fashion of Alexander McQueen I have noticed that there seems to be a strange similarity between his style and the cinematic vision of Matthew Barney's Cremaster Cycle. One of the most obvious examples of this is if we are to take a look at one of Barney's recurring characters and put that alongside one of McQueen's t-shirt concepts.

Although there are obviously more high-fashion examples of this similarity, it is interesting to see how even McQueen's "highstreet" clothing has the same attention towards a bizarre piece of cloth covering a man's mouth. 

Another strange similarity is that both parties used a model called Aimee Mullins. What makes Mullins unique is that she was born with fibular hemimelia (missing fibula bones) and, as a consequence of this, had both of her legs amputated at the knee. In the case of McQueen she modelled in his London show, on a pair of hand-carved wooden prosthetic legs made from solid ash, with integral boots. The following image is of these leg-boots that where hand carved for the House of McQueen.

3 years after her controversial debut into the fashion world she appeared as a cheetah women in Barney's Cremaster 3. At this point it is obvious that Barney was the one that was highly influenced by McQueen as he had a tendency to implement the McQueen aesthetic to his work. However, rather than merely being a copycat I think that his usage of this aesthetic is a clean cut homage to McQueen and only further serves to fuel the impact his fashion has had on the world around him. 

The image above displays how Barney presentation of Aimee Mullins clearly plays homage to McQueen in the sense that he has made unique prosthetic legs that function as an extension of the cheetah/woman hybrid that he was trying to manufacture. To cap off this fleeting look at the similarities between Barney and McQueen I have sourced the following video, which gives a heads up contrast of a McQueen fashion show against clips from Barney's Cremaster Cycle. Have a look and see how you feel about the apparent aesthetic similarities.

A Journey Through My Recent Ear Blockage

Two days ago I decided to have a bath (apparently a remedy for a dull aching spine) and just like usual after lying in my own waste for what seemed like more than long enough I decided to wash my hair. Now typically I would just wash my hair in the shower, but when I have a bath I generally rub the shampoo/conditioner into my hair and then proceed to fully submerge myself under water. When submerged I begin rubbing my head just like you would if you were standing under the shower. To me this seems like the most convenient way to wash your hair in the bath. However, one recurring issue that I have is that because of my issue with my body generating too much ear wax, when I submerge myself it generally results in one if not both of my ears becoming completely blocked. After being told that I was an idiot for performing this submerging routine in the first place, I then escalated the scenario by listening to an old wives' tale and began pouring a load of olive oil into my right ear canal. I then went to sleep with a piece of tissue gently lying alongside my ear. 

In the morning I awoke to find that the numbed sound intake in my right ear had escalated and now I could not hear anything out of it at all. To add fuel to the fire the dull ache in my lower back had shifted into an aggravated yelp. After splurging the wrong information to a pharmacist I had to go to another pharmacy and make sure not to mention that I was hoping to fly soon and/or that it hurt. The truth is it did hurt, but this was not because it was infected, it was due to the fact that every digit on my hand had been squirming inside my ear canal over the course of the day trying to free the black notch that had formed inside my head. 

After getting my hand on some Earex I thought everything would be ok. After the first dropping session my ear felt like it was swelling from the inside out and the notch could now be felt as it pushed against the walls of my inner ear. Upon realising that my brain was almost about to squeeze out my ear I finally decided to read the instructions for the product. The final sentence informed me that for the first few applications it could cause swelling and give the illusion that the problem was getting worse. 

You will be glad to know that after maintaining a steady application for the last two days, today at 15:12 I managed to dislodge a nugget of black scum the size of a penny and with its freedom the sounds of the world have slowly begun to flood back into my ear.

So what I have I learned throughout this journey over the last three days. Well I have learnt that my method of washing my hair in the bath is apparently somewhat odd, that the ability to hear is a sense that is often disregarded in favour of the other "better" senses and finally if you dislodge a solidified wax ball out of your ear don't let your sense of smell be the first thing to greet it as it enters the world. Save the strange smelling for more interesting scent experiments.

Deodorant vs Sweat - Which One Is Sexier?

So on my Easter Sunday walk morning walk down from the burnt remains of a jovial nights camping there was a particular strand of conversation that led to this blog being written. Amidst the morning tweets and hangover sodden bodies talk about the origins of deodorant wafted through the air. Well all you wing clipped birds out there you will be glad to know that the first under-arm deodorant was invented by a man called Ziryab in AL-Andalus. Stemming from this 9th century invention the first commercial deodorant called Mum was developed and patented by a U.S. inventor in 1888. Below is a 1926 version of the product.

Now, after taking the time to give a very brief insight into the long and complicated development of a product that has existed since the 9th century I would like to get back onto the forest tracks of this morning and the winding banter that accompanied them. As our queries about the origins of deodorant quickly disappeared (due to lack of internet) the conversation began to swing in the direction of performance and deodorant. We discussed how being sweaty has become synonymous with not being sexy. Even though it is a clear demarcation that you are a functioning biological machine. This made me think of the singer Christy Moore and his sweat soaked musical performances. The question is does his perfuse sweating induce a sexy sense of musical passion and desire or is it a off-putting dripfest?

According to a recent Metro UK article there is a new perfume on sale at Harvey Nichols that has been designed from the ground up to smell like a combination of blood, sweat, saliva and a dollop of semen. This strange scent is obviously trying to corner the more subversive side of the market, whilst also being aware that many of such odours are what attracts a mate.

So the next time you consider spraying some deodorant or whacking on a quick bit of roll-on why not keep in mind that sweat can be used to your advantage in the capturing of a mate, but just keep in mind that there is a fine line between having an inviting body odour and having one that smells like your skin is rotting. Over and out for now from the skin sniffing team at MRHP.

Should Muslims Get Naked? The Female Che Guevara Reveals All

There is outrage among the hardcore elements of the Muslim community. Sila Sahin, a 25 year old living in cosmopolitan world of Berlin has shown it all for Playboy magazine.  She is the first Turkish woman model to strip. She hoped to show other Turkish women to be free and choice their own lifestyles without pressure from a misogynistic male cultural hegemony.

She told Playboy:

I have always abided by what men say. As a result I developed an extreme desire for freedom. I feel like Che Guevara. I have to do everything I want, otherwise I feel like I may as well be dead

She responded emotionally to the backlash back home in Turkey saying in tears"I hope you can forgive me. Please let me come home," Or is that the male dominated media twisting her words?

300

To commemorate our 300th post, here is Rammstein doing what they do best to moving images from the movie 300. 

The World's First 3D Porn Film

The first 3D porn film will be released simultaneously in cinemas throughout Hong Kong. The film is called 3-D Sex and Zen: Extreme Ecstasy, it is set in the times of the Ming Dynasty, and according to AFP "chronicles the story of a young man who, after being introduced to the erotic world of an aristocrat, realizes his ex-wife is the love of his life."

Hong Kong isn't the only place to find 3D Porn, Hollywood will help fund Tinto Brass whose most famous film is Caligula which was a collaboration with Gore Vidal, who to plans to make a 3D Porn film revolving around a plot of a Roman emperor.

Woody Allan spoke at Cannes about the possibility of such a genre of films: "I like 3D movies because three-dimensional women look a lot better. I don't see it in my movies, but for Playboy it will be perfect."

Review of the Financial Times

                                The Money Monkey Review

                     Font:   9
                                             Content:   5
                    Taste:  7                                                                                                                                                                                  Similarity to Bananas:  3

Overall Rating:  6½ 

Lady Gaga's Birthday Today How Will She Celebrate

Lady Gaga is 25 today, born on the 28th of March 1986, but how will the singing, dancing, fashionista celebrate her birthday. In the build up to her birthday on twitter she tweeted to all her fans that "The sweetest tweet! You are all the present I need in the world." 

Okay so how exactly is she celebrating that's what you all came here to know, well rumor has it that she will be listening to an extended version of John Cage's 4' 33, the extended version lasts several hours. Once that is completed she will then meet with Bear Grylls and travel to Yosemite national park and begin a six hour trek in search of an Elk carcass and then boil the elks eye ball in a geyser. Once this has been accomplished she will return home and watch Stepbrothers, her favourite movie in the whole wide world. Then to cap off the day she is going to slide down 32 steps into a strawberry cheese-cake. Happy Birthday Lady Gaga have a great day and enjoy your festivities.  

If Happiness Were a Hat

Like many of you I have strolled through many a department store. You may have noticed that when meandering  through the hat section, a cloud of happiness and joy taints your vision and before you know it, you are gooning about with your companion trying on a selection of hatty all-sorts. The toffy-nosed chortling of the elderly ladies trying on hats next to you cause you to chuckle and gall and without warning you’re all fanning about with more and more hats and indulging in the millinery delights. But lo! Be warned I have discovered why hats make us feel so unexpectedly happy!

They have all been fitted with the following device that delivers extreme pain to the frowning model. Upon each dosage of pain a smile quickly ensues to prevent further pain caused by the frowning facial muscles. However since its creation in 2009, the Happiness Hat has undergone further modifications to supply pain on a less crude, more subconscious level and has subsequently been fitted to every at ever made! So next time you’re with your friends trying on hats, just ask yourself the question, why are we all so happy?

VINTAGE OR RETRO?

Vintage is back? What does that even mean? If “vintage is back” then surely it means that it was once gone, but it was never really gone, just on sabbatical, because as fashion is renowned for, it is recycles, resurrects and re-formulates, therefore, is what we call vintage, even vintage at all?

Take for example the pin up style of Betty Page and see how it correlates to the immaculate and very current Dita Von Teese, also in the 70s the young hipsters and groovers like Levi and the Rockats were styling themselves on the teddy boys and rockabillies of the 40s and 50s. Maybe it was okay to call it vintage back in the 70s when Levi and the Rockats were doing it, but how many times can a style or trend be revisited and still be called vintage?

(Andy Warhol T.V with Debbie Harry)

All the indie kids now are pulling back threads that were definitive of the mod generation in the 60s. But is it actually vintage or is it retro?

(The Vintage Look)

What frustrates me about today’s Vintage Look is that the fickle followers of fashion trends don’t even know what vintage they are wearing, or wear something that “looks” vintage but isn’t vintage at all, rather it is a 

Topshop vintage inspired piece and still they have the audacity to call it vintage.

Usually music or social politics inspire fashion trends, mods, rockers, punks, metalheads, power dressers, anti-fashion stylistas, so what does our current magpie approach to borrowing from all of these past styles and trends say about us and our contemporary society?

As we can see with indie music, a certain mod-style is called back onto the highstreet, so what we have now is a retro revival, not a vintage vivification. There is a fine line between what is vintage and what is retro. Vintage is a one-off piece of great quality and value from a particular epoch in fashion history. That which is retro, is in fact what most of us who trawl through the markets of Brick Lane and Soho are wearing, cheaper, more affordable pieces that are retrospective reminders of past trends, which probably were mass-produced,

as mass-production of fashion trends have occurred since the mid-20th century.

So why do we, as young trend setters and followers seek to rejuvenate that against which our forebears once rebelled, in fact, against which the fashion industry itself rebelled? What is the constant obsession with the past and how does re-visiting it inspire future trends? And why now more than ever before are we so nostalgic for the fashions of previous eras? I leave these questions open to you and please feel free to respond with whatever is on your mind.